My neighbor sent me an e-mail last night. She had accidentally found my blog from a Google search she did on our school district and I guess at some point I made mention of our school district in relation to the weather (another story.) But anyway, she called me this morning to say this, "Ondrea, I had no idea you were so talented. I told my husband to go and read your blog. I can't believe you can do all that you do with four kids. Where do you find the time? And I didn't know you were so spiritual. I had no idea! When I come back in another life, I want to be in your family. Your family looks like so much fun." Now, these are not her EXACT words, but they are something very similar to what she said. So, to that, I must respond. Because if my neighbor, who sees this craziness lived out first hand, thinks I have it all together, then what kind of impression have I left with all of you, who don't see me at school with my hair in a three day pony-tail and mismatched clothing?
First, let me say that the fact that Sharon had no idea I was "so spiritual" just goes to show what a miserable failure I am at the thing that matters the very most in this world, my walk with my Savior! I'm a pit-dweller, of grand proportion, which I have said numberous times. However, I'm obviously not living it out loud that my Lord rescued me from that pit and put me on solid ground. It's ground that still shakes from time to time of my own doing, but He's there holding it together for me. I do not have it all together, in fact, I can't find half of what I thought I had together and but for God I'd be curled up in the fetal position somewhere right now, probably not knowing my own name, much less getting four kids fed and loving my husband. Now, if Sharon does happen to read this post, she is the kind of sweet person who will feel bad that I felt bad about the comment that she obviously meant as a compliment to me. Sharon, stop it! You are an amazing friend and I took it every bit in the spirit in which you said it, but I also know that I left you with the wrong impression because I'm a big fat failure at serving my Redeemer with anything close to what would be appropriate and I want it to be known far and wide that I recognize that!
Second, she asked how I have time to write so much. Well, here's the ugly truth of that little secret:
Enough said about the "laundry topic".
And as for my family being so much fun... well, I'll spare you my kids opinion on that, but I wonder how Liam would have replied to that question yesterday as I was shoving him out the door and yelling, "Run, you're going to miss the bus!"
I want you all to know that I often go days without washing my hair (thus, I keep it long so I can wear a pony-tail!) My laundry looks like this more often than not. My floors are never so clean you could eat off of them, in fact, sometimes I worry about the dog eating off them. We do not have a five second rule at our home, it's "If you get it before the dog does, you can have it." I did pick up spilled blueberries yesterday and put them back in the container before I realized I had scooped as much dog hair (love the Golden Retrievers) as I had blueberries so I was forced to actually wash them before letting my kids eat them. Though to be truthful, I'm sure they've eaten worse. If you come to my house it will most likely be dirty. And if it's not, that's because it's all shoved in the mud room. Don't ever look in there if you want to be invited back. My friends ALL KNOW that adults are NOT ALLOWED upstairs at my house. Seriously! And I warn folks, if you go up, you're on your own, I'm not sending a search party if you don't come back. I procrastinate everything until the very last minute, hoping my hubby might do it for me (like unload the dishwasher, call the insurace company, etc.) and I forget almost every birthday on my calendar. Because I also frequently forget to LOOK at my calendar! I have the attention span of a gnat and it's something I don't know how to fix because every effort at fixing it is quickly diverted into "Oh look, there goes a chicken..." Oh yeah, distraction!
Someone left this verse for me in my comments yesterday and I love it, plus it seems appropriate enough:
2 Samuel 22:29-30
"You are my lamp, O Lord! O my God, you brighten the darkness about me. For with your aid I run against an armed band, and by the help of my God I leap over a wall."